Thursday, May 19, 2011

Dealing with the Unthinkable...

Guys,

In a previous post, I posted about and linked to the False Rape Society's classic on avoiding false rape accusations.  However, given the misandric laws and legal system, there's a good chance one of us will be wrongfully convicted, and will spend time behind bars for a crime we did NOT commit.  What do we do then?  This post answers that question; this post will help us deal with the unthinkable: going to prison...

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How To Survive in Prison as an Innocent Man Convicted of a Sex Crime

James D. Anderson*

Psychology Editor's Note: This article includes some strong views that may be surprising and challenging. We have chosen to publish it because we believe prisoners have a right to seek interaction with those outside the prison walls. We also believe there are many innocent men and women in prison who are wrongly convicted of sex offenses. They too, have a right to stand up for their innocence. One of the more poignant episodes in our lives was in June, 1985, when Lois Bentz, accused with her husband, Robert, of sexually abusing children in Jordan, Minnesota, was told by her attorney about a very attractive plea bargain. With tears running down her face, Lois said to us, "I did not do it and I will not say I did something I didn't do." The Bentzes rejected the plea bargain and went to trial. The Bentzes were acquitted and the Jordan case is often regarded as the beginning of the "backlash" that has led to increased awareness of false accusations and the reversals of several highly publicized convictions in recent years.

Still there are many many lesser known cases where Large numbers of innocent people remain behind bars. We receive letters every week from men and women in prison who assert their innocence. For years we have agonized about what we can do in response. The most we have been able to do is to try to stay in contact and provide information to assist those working on appeals. Based upon our experience with Ms. Bentz, we have also tried to say what Mr. Anderson repeats several times in this article -- maintain your own personal integrity. Mr. Anderson tells us how he has done this for himself. It may not be a way that works for everyone, but this is what he tells us works for him. We believe Mr. Anderson is very likely to walk out of prison when his time is served and be standing up straight and tall.

Your only exposure to what prison is like has been through movies that sensationalize the violence, drug use, and sex in the big house. The prison bus you're on rounds a lonely highway corner and you get your first glimpse of what is to be your home for the next 10-odd years -- a steel, razor wire, and concrete house of pain. You wonder how you'll ever make it out of this hate factory alive. You imagine your first day being gang-raped by six huge, tattooed lifers, by the end of the week you're being sold up and down the tier for cigarettes, and within a month, you're found dead in your cell with a twelve-inch "shank" protruding from your chest. Not only are you the new fish in the cell block, but you have been convicted of a sex crime, and you've heard how convicted sex criminals are abused in the joint.

You're one of the thousands of innocent men wrongly convicted of sex crimes in the U.S. every year. Won't it matter to your fellow prisoners that you are not a sex criminal and are completely innocent? Not in the least. It is possible, though, to make it through prison even though you were convicted of a skin beef. You can not only live through the prison experience, you can claim some degree of victory at the end of your unjust prison term. Life will be neither easy nor fun for the innocent man convicted of a sex crime and sent to prison. But, surviving prison is not impossible.

I have spent over seven years in maximum-, medium-, and minimum security prisons after being wrongly convicted of first degree rape -- the result of my having been falsely accused of date rape by a mentally deranged woman with a history of falsely accusing men of sex crimes. I am writing this from the Oregon State Correctional Institution. Although life has not been easy for me in prison, I have managed to keep my self-respect, my dignity, and my integrity. I have spent months in solitary confinement for defending myself when necessary. I have allowed no prisoner, no prison guard, and no member of the parole board to disrespect me due to my wrongful conviction. I have consistently maintained my innocence, even when doing so has added years to my prison term.

I earned a college degree behind bars, and have even escaped from prison once. To help other innocent prisoners, I founded the Society Against False Accusations of Rape (SAFAR), and for five years have published the underground prison publication, The SAFAR Newsletter. Currently, I'm working on my book, Falling on the Deaf Ear: False Accusations of Rape, Child Abuse Hoaxes, Innocent People in Prison and How to End the Sex Crime Witchhunt. I know first-hand what it is to be an innocent man in prison, wrongly convicted of a sex crime, and I know how to survive the prison experience.

Now that you have been falsely accused of rape or child abuse, been convicted in record time, lost all your assets along with your reputation, and been sentenced to 10 years in prison by a judge who couldn't care less that you are innocent, you would think your troubles are over. Think again. You not only have to make it out of the prison with your life and sanity, but with your self-respect, honor, and integrity intact. Let's face it. After being wrongly convicted of a sex crime, your sanity, self-respect, honor, and integrity is all you have left. Prison will not break you if you are a man -- or learn to become a man, even though the main goal of prison officials is to sap the soul from men, and spit out castrated, submissive males. With all the odds against you, it is even possible to walk out of prison a better man with your head held high. Again, it will be neither fun nor easy, but what battle ever is easy? You can either walk out of prison with your manhood intact knowing you beat the corrupt prison industry or you can crawl out on your belly as a hated sex offender.

Outside Contacts

Don't fool yourself that the community will be outraged that you were convicted and sent to prison for a crime you didn't commit or that may have never even occurred. You are now a convicted sex offender and your innocence means nothing. You're the lowest of the low, in and out of prison. There will be no mass protests at the prison gates demanding your release.

Most people believe the propaganda of the sex crime witch hunters and probably feel you should die in prison. Most of your friends will abandon you and even some members of your family will turn their backs on you. Only your very best friends and your immediate family will stick by your side at first and most of them will fall by the wayside in the coming years as you rot in prison.

One of the most important things for the innocent man in prison is to maintain contact with at least one person on the outside. This person can help you try to prove your innocence and keep you current on what's happening outside the prison walls. If you can maintain contact with at least one free worlder to help you, you'll be doing a lot better than some prisoners. Many prisoners lose their friends and their own families and are isolated in prison with no contact with the outside world. You are going to be walking into prison alone and will be alone while you do your time. You need at least one ally in the outside to help free yourself from the nightmare of being thrown in a cage and given the scarlet letter of a convicted sex offender for a crime you did not commit.

Prison violence

For the most part, prisons and correctional institutions are not the hell holes of years past. The "get tough on crime" craze has mutated into "get tough on prisoners." Although prisons are not for continued and endless punishment, politicians don't want to educate or rehabilitate prisoners. Prisoners are to be warehoused like the commodities they've become. College courses and vocational training in prison are a thing of the past. With all the new prisons being built in the U.S., doing time has become quite sterile -- even safe -- because all the new prisons are so controlled and high-tech that prisoners now spend most of their time in their cells.

The idea that prisoners really run the joint is a myth. Some of the older prisons are still dangerous, but these are slowly being phased out. It used to be that only the worst, most dangerous, and most hardened criminal was sent to prison. It was no wonder that penitentiaries were dangerous. But these days, with so many first-time offenders doing mandatory prison terms and so many people being sent to prison, the nation's lock-ups have become diluted with nonviolent prisoners. Today most prisons can even be considered safe.

In all my years behind bars, I've never seen a murder, a stabbing, or a rape. I believe some prisoners try to brag how tough prison is to make themselves look tough. They romanticize their prison experience by telling their friends and family how brutal prison was and how they had to fight for their lives every day. Prison, however, may be harder for the innocent man convicted of a sex crime because of the scorn. In the old days, a convicted sex offender -- innocent or guilty -- was sure to get physically attacked. Today, that is not the case. A man wrongly convicted of a sex crime can make it out of prison unharmed if he stays on his toes and keeps alert.

What about all the violence you read about what goes on in prison? Of course, violence does happen in U.S. penitentiaries, but with over 1.6 million Americans locked up these days, the chance of being one of the few hundred inmates who are killed or seriously injured is slim.

Standing Up for Yourself

Because you were convicted of a sex crime, you will not be winning any popularity contests with your fellow prisoners. At first, the other prisoners may mark you to be victimized and harassed. If you don't stand tall and fight back, you'll be victimized your entire prison term. You must stand up for yourself when you are tested by some idiot who thinks you're a rape-o, "Chester," "tree jumper," or "freak." In 1989, I was compelled to beat a man who attacked me with a folding chair. Besides a little blood, neither one of us was hurt badly. I did accidentally break a guard's hand in the melee and I've also had to fight a couple of other morons who disrespected me, but I haven't had any trouble in years. It is well worth it to spend a few months in solitary confinement for defending yourself when the option is being harassed continually in general population. Another option is hiding for years in Protective Custody (PC), totally separated from the rest of the prison, and locked in a cell for 24-hours a day. But only the weakest prisoners go PC, and I don't recommend it.

For the most part, even for the wrongly convicted sex offender, if you don't owe debts from gambling or drugs, and if you stay away from the homosexuals, keep your head down, don't bother anyone, and don't act like a wimp and whine about your wrongful conviction, you won't have to worry about prison violence. There is very little chance that you will be killed or even stabbed. But, if something does happen and you need to defend your good name, be a man and do it. In prison, your good name is all you have. If trouble comes your way in prison, you have to deal with it on the spot. Where are you going to run? You're in a cage.

Inmates and Convicts

During my years in prison I have found that there are two types of prisoners -- inmates and convicts. Inmates will not fight if their lives depend on it and they will kiss any ass that comes their way. Inmates are the type of prisoners who go on national TV to praise prison officials and prison programs for straightening out their miserable lives. The inmate has no loyalty to anything or anyone except himself. Inmates will do anything to please their captors and cheerfully inform and rat on other prisoners for breaking prison rules. Inmates are not men.

Be aware that you can't always tell an inmate worm by his cover. The biggest, baddest killer on the tier can be the biggest, snitch rat in the joint. On the other hand, convicts used to be very common in U.S. prisons, but are now a dying breed. A true convict would never rat on anyone, would take no disrespect, would fight when necessary and would be loyal and live by a code of honor. Unlike an inmate, a convict is a man.

A convicted sex offender will never be considered a true convict by other prisoners, but you can live by your own code of honor in prison. Never whine or complain about your wrongful conviction; sniveling will only make you appear weak and make you a target. Other prisoners don't care about your innocence. The prison hierarchy has you at the bottom of the prison barrel. Your jacket is that of a sex offender but it's up to you if you wear this degrading jacket. You will find that the only prisoners who hang around the sex offender are other wide-eyed, scared, spineless sex offenders. Even though prison is going to be very lonely for the innocent man convicted of a sex crime, you don't want to befriend confessed sex offenders. Also, stay away from the prison chapel. For some strange reason, confessed sex offenders always find God in prison and carry their Bibles for all to see to show how repentant they are. In short, even though no one convicted of a sex beef can be a true convict, you must strive to be one.

Talking About Your Conviction

You may think that if you don't tell any of your fellow prisoners you were convicted of a sexual offense that no one will be the wiser and you won't be harassed. You may think that you can tell people you're a bank robber and even be a hero in prison. Nice try, but lying about what you were convicted of will not work. There are no secrets in prison, especially on why you are there. You're in prison now, and any possibility of privacy or keeping secrets is long gone. Be honest when talking about your wrongful conviction and get ready to defend yourself if it becomes necessary.

All of the convicted sex offenders (innocent or guilty) whom I've heard tell other prisoners that they were burglars or robbers in an effort to hide their convictions were eventually exposed. If you lie about your conviction, you will be exposed. Then, any attempts to claim innocence will not be believed and your prison time may get very tough. Don't advertise your wrongful conviction, or the facts of your supposed crime, but when asked why you're in prison, be honest.

Although a convicted sex offender can never gain full respect in prison, I've managed to gain some measure of respect by being truthful about why I am in prison, and fighting when necessary. Sure, some punk may call me a "rape-o" behind my back, but no prisoner ever disrespects me face to face. With so many innocent men being sent to prison these days on false accusations of rape and child abuse, the general prison population is starting to understand how widespread the sex crime witchhunt has become, and how many innocent men are now in prison due to false allegations. False reports of rape and other sex crimes are so common that an innocent man wrongfully convicted of a sex crime will not be alone.

Prison Guards

The men and women who hold the key to your freedom (the prison guards) should be considered your enemy. There is a reason that surveys on job status and job satisfaction often rate being a prison guard as the lowest job a person can hold. No one respects prison guards, and they know it. What kind of man or woman would want to examine body openings for contraband, turn keys, and stand around and do nothing for a living? Prison guards hate their jobs and blame prisoners for their unhappy and unfulfilled lives. It takes no ambition, no talent, no drive, or any creativity to be a corrections officer. Even police officers know this, and look down on the lowly prison guard. Think about it. Does any kid have dreams of being a corrections officer when he or she grows up?

The Golden Rule to remember not only about prison guards, but about anyone that works inside the prison in which you are held captive, is to stay as far away from them as possible and avoid even talking to them unnecessarily. Even if you happen to run across a prison guard who appears to be halfway human, don't befriend him. Every inmate whom I've seen develop any type of friendship with any prison employee was, in the end, betrayed and shunned by other prisoners. Don't collaborate with anyone other than fellow prisoners while in prison. Every prison official or staff member is your enemy. Never forget that. They will gladly shoot you in the back if they feel the need. Don't make eye contact with the people who work at the prison because if you avoid eye contact they will leave you alone. The less contact you have with prison employees, the better off you will be.

In all my years in prison, I've observed hundreds of prison guards and only a couple could be considered normal. The typical male guard I have encountered is not someone you would consider a winner. He is usually a skinny geek (or is extremely overweight), is undereducated, has no ambition and is sadistic. His idea of success is a monthly state paycheck, a trailer home, a 12-pack of beer, and nightly TV. The typical female prison guard is homosexual, physically unattractive, overweight, and more masculine than most male prison guards. She's mad at the world for not being born a man and she takes her penis envy out on prisoners.

I fully admit my dislike for prison guards because I am convinced that every prison guard in the U.S. has witnessed, encouraged, and/or participated in the torture or murder of prisoners. Prison guards are cowards with a badge who are protected by the state and prison guard unions. Your only allies in prison are other prisoners. Never forget it.

Keeping Fit

One of the most important things to do while doing your prison time is to keep in the very best physical shape possible. Every prison has a weight room, and I strongly suggest pumping iron. Being in top shape not only feels good, but it's good for your head and will help you think more clearly. By working out, running, exercising, and eating as well as possible, you will be physically able to defend yourself in case of any violent situations. You will also be able to think straight to combat your unjust conviction. All the guys whom I've seen go insane in prison did not care about their health. They rotted in front of a TV for years until they were just a shell of a man. At age thirty-five, I am now in the best shape of my life and feel great.

Another reason to stay healthy in prison is that medical services are notoriously horrid. One of my worst prison experiences was when our prison doctor told me that blood tests indicated that I had liver cancer. He smiled gleefully as he told me I had only a year to live. I tried to learn more, but he refused to answer my questions and ordered me out of his office. For months I thought I was going to leave this mad house on a slab. I learned later that my blood test indicated only that I had been exposed to hepatitis in the past. The good prison doctor told me I was dying for his own sick amusement.

Dental services are just as bad in prison. I'm currently waiting to have a back molar filled. I cracked my tooth on a rock in some chili in the chow hall. I've been on the waiting list to see the dentist for over six months now, and will probably lose the tooth due to neglect. There is nothing I can do about it.

While in prison, stay in shape, work out, run, and try to eat well -- even though that's nearly impossible with the garbage that passes for food in prison. But, although you may get depressed, lonely, and frustrated in prison, never go to the prison psychologist. Prison shrinks only want to drug prisoners into submission. One of the newest fads in corrections is tranquilizers that are given out like candy to pacify and control inmates. What better way to turn prisoners into submissive zombies than by medicating them for depression and anxiety. Don't fall into the medication trap in prison. You need to be clear-headed while doing time, not in a drugged-out haze.

When you go to prison, settle down and find a positive routine. After the shock of prison wears off, and the other prisoners figure out you will defend yourself, you'll be left alone to do your time. Don't sit around vegetating in front of a TV, playing cards or reading westerns. Don't waste your time complaining about your wrongful conviction and what a poor victim you are. Don't turn into what I call a "prison zombie" who does his time like he's waiting to die. Your main mission in prison will be trying to get your unjust conviction overturned. Learn as much about the law and the corrupt legal system as you can. Get to know the prisoner law clerks in the law library, and spend as much time in the library as possible. Study every aspect of your case, and stay on top of your attorney. Your lawyer is not the one in prison, you are. The appeals process takes years. Prisoners rarely win a new trial because the criminal justice system is not about truth and justice, but you can't win if you don't try. Fighting the legal system will be frustrating and depressing, but try not to give up hope.

Not only do we prisoners have to stick together, but we men must also join forces in our fight against feminism. Become a soldier in the Men's Rights Fight. Contact the antifeminist, pro-family men's groups in your area, as well as some of the national groups.

Sex Offender Treatment

One of the most profitable scams in the prison behavioral modification business is the sex-offender treatment industry. Because you were convicted of a sex offense, you are now fuel for the sex-offender treatment profiteers. You will be expected to confess to your crime, end all appeals for a fair trial, dismiss all delusions of innocence, and participate in sex-offender treatment along with admitted child molesters and serial rapists. Confession is the main tenet of sex-offender treatment. It does not matter to prison officials that you have always maintained your innocence and are in the process of appeal.

Thousands of people work in the sex-offender treatment industry and to justify their high-paying state jobs you must confess to your offense. You are the meal ticket not only of prison guards but also sex-offender treatment providers. As a wrongly convicted prisoner, you should have nothing to do with sex-offender treatment. Be a man, and stand up for what is right. There will be repercussions for you for not confessing and becoming another admitted sex offender. You will be denied any good-time off your prison term and early parole will be out of the question. I have always refused to even speak to sex-offender treatment counselors. Not only have I been denied any time off my sentence for good behavior, but the Oregon Parole Board has labeled me mentally unfit and dangerous to society because I refuse to confess, show remorse, and beg for forgiveness.

Not only should you avoid sex-offender treatment, but I suggest you refuse to participate in any behavior modification programs in prison. Don't admit anything to prison officials or prison counselors. Those who work in the behavior modification industry behind prison walls will use anything you tell them against you. Tell them nothing about your past. Prison counselors are not your friends.

Never talk to any prison psychologist. There is no faster way to be labeled mentally and emotionally unfit than to trust a prison psychologist. As a convicted sex offender, innocent or not, you are the bread and butter of the sex-offender treatment industry, prison counselors/psychologists, and prison guards. The only way they can justify their jobs is to keep you in their prison programs as long as possible. Be aware of their true motives, don't trust them, tell them nothing, and never doubt yourself. You owe them nothing.

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Hopefully, none of us will ever need this information, but you never know.  In this PC, misandric world, a man can go to prison on little more than the woman's say-so; if a woman points the finger in your direction, you could go to prison.  Having a plan for dealing with the unthinkable will leave us all better prepared should it happen to us...

MarkyMark

Saturday, March 12, 2011

How to Tell If Your Girlfriend Is Psycho...

Guys,

Here's an INDISPENSABLE tool for any MGHOW: discerning psycho women.  Here's a video to help figure out if your GF is a psycho bitch...

Sunday, February 13, 2011

Hangin' On, by Chris in OR

Guys,

I was reading at Happy Bachelors when I found the following post.  I know I've posted this or something similar, but this needs to be repeated; this is something my boys need to hear.  They need to hear about how to make it till 30, when the allure of women wears off...

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During my twenties my parents constantly told me if I could just get to thirty, I would be home free. They were right.

Women, even the truly attractive ones, somehow just aren't that attractive once your sex drive starts to disappear. The fog lifts, and you start noticing the annoying and down-right rotten things about women that you never noticed when you were blinded by your sex drive.

You start seeing the physical imperfections that even the prettiest women have. The blemishes. The overuse of cosmetics. Things caught in their teeth. Plaque build-up. Hair on the lip. Less than perfect hair dye. Bad hair cut. Bushy eye brows. Bad breath. The stupid laugh that grates on your nerves. Her lack of knowledge in current affairs. Shit. The list grows ever longer as you grow older, and your patience grows shorter.

Women simply start to annoy by their mere presence after a point in life.

When you hit forty, the situation becomes laughable. If you listen to nothing else I say, boys, trust me on this one:

The satisfaction you get from snubbing or cancelling out on a date at the last minute with a 35+ attractive woman makes the misery you suffered at the hands of women all worth while.

Granted; I never really suffered, as I avoided them, but what the heck, I might as well enjoy it as long as it's being throw in my face.

I took the last few days off work, and rode my Harley Beasties around. Just because I bloody-well wanted to. Today, I rode all around the snow covered mountains surrounding Mt. St. Helens. An absolute blast. Most of the roads are still closed due to extremely heavy snow. So, I rode where I could, and sat at a viewpoint for about fifteen minutes talking about motorcycles with the Under-Sheriff of Skamania county. He rides, and we had a blast sitting there staring at Mt. St. Helens and talking about the Elk and Deer that inhabit the area. It was a memory that will last forever. Fifteen minutes with a total stranger permanantley imprinted on my mind. It sure beat the hell out of spending the day perusing the aisles of K-Mart with a fat bitch of a wife.

I came home, watched movies, a few episodes of Hogan's Heroes, and it's off to bed. Tomorrow, I stop by the doctor because I've been riding my bikes so much, it's re-activated a long dormant 'roid. Hope he can cure it. lol. Ah, the penalties of being a care-free bachelor. Oops. I meant joys.

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Amen!  Just hang in there, Fellas; sooner or later your sex drive will die off, and you too can be free from the clutches of a terrible beast; you too can resist the allure of women.  I needed to be reminded of this, so I don't get the hots for someone like Maria.  WTF was I thinking?!  Anyway, thanks for the reminder, Chris!  Until next time...

MarkyMark

Sunday, January 30, 2011

Outlaw2747's Thoughts on Dating

Folks,

I was just rereading a thread on Mancoat, and it was about ending dating bitterness. This fine post was by Outlaw2747. Armageddon15 nominated it for post of the year-it's THAT good! I decided to give it a wider audience. There is much truth in Outlaw2747's words; I found them to be uplifting, edifying, enlightening, etc., and I hope you do too...

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I say don't do anything (or at the most very little) for women. If you desire them so, let them come to you. Sometimes you have to be selfish to get things to go your way in life. No one on this damn earth will take of you better than you. I'll show you what I mean, the common denominator is quite simple:

-Get a new car because YOU like it, not because it'll attract a female.

-Get a new outfit because you feel you'll look good in it, not to attract some female.

-Get a decent job because you want to live a decent life, not to get some female's attention.

-Be good at dancing because it is fun, not to attract a female.

-Listen to what you want to listen to because it sounds good, not because it'll be an icebreaker for a female.

-Read whatever you want to read because YOU enjoy it, not to impress a female.

-Work out because you want to live a longer and healthier life, not to get females to touch your body.

-Own a dog because you love it and it is a great companion, not to have more females come up to you.

-Learn to fight because you want to defend yourself, not to show a female how bad ass you are.

AND MOST OF ALL...

Be yourself. Why kill yourself to impress some female that will not accept you for you? You have worked so hard to become what you are now, why throw that away for the promises of a potential piece of ass or to hopefully get a good girl out of a wench? Make changes in your life because it is healthy for your welfare. Stop smoking because it is nasty. Stop eating junk because it'll make you fat. Stop or slow down drinking so you won't wind up on the 6 o'clock news in a body bag. Don't do it to make a female like you.

That is the problem with this country, all this focus on grabbing a female and little focus on grabbing a good life. Sure, once in a while and step into the waters to see what female life is out there and pursue what you find interesting (only because you WANT to and not because you NEED to). Whether it be for a friend, girlfriend, or marriage (I personally do not recommend that however, especially in the USA.). But always remember this, your home, money, personal will, and even the dog will always be there if you keep up with them, a female will come and go. Don't make large expectations when it comes to a date so when the disappointment hits, it isn't so bad.

But for those who do not wish to date or do little of it, take it from me... THERE IS NO SHAME IN BEING SINGLE OR CELIBATE.

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Cost/Benefit Analysis of Getting Poon, by BEM

Guys,

I have some BRILLIANT commenters here @ MarkyMark's Thoughts on Various Issues; I'm humbled when they share their thoughts, given their depth of wisdom, experience, and knowledge.  The following comment was made in response to the OCS classic I posted recently: My Take on All Women Aren't Like That.  You'll see why when you read BEM's thoughts on the cost/benefit analysis of poon.  This is good stuff!  Enjoy...

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Since the issue of game has been raised, I would like to chime in. I have, in my time, practiced game and gotten my share of poontang, for whatever it's worth - and let me tell you, as someone who is nearing forty, and who's shagged dozens of women, that the costs of pussy FAR outweigh the benefits.

Don't believe me? Consider the case of Ben Roethlisberger, a multi-millionaire athlete and two-time Super Bowl champion, a man at whom most women would hurl themselves in a heartbeat. The word just came out that Big Ben will not be charged with sexual assault for the incident that occurred in Georgia last month. Sources say that the alleged victim made inconsistent statements in her testimony, and had a high blood alcohol content on the night of the incident.

This is all unsurprising to me, as well as to many readers of MM's blog, but consider this: What if Roethlisberger was NOT a wealthy man who could counter the shenanigans of law enforcement officials with a crack investigative team of his own? In other words, what if he was like you or me? His life would be in ruins, that's what.

I've been where the game-players like illness are, cocky as shit, thinking they've got the world by the tail, that nothing bad will happen to them as they chase tail, night after night. Well, as a retired game-player, I can look back on my pussy-chasing days and realize that for the most part, in regards to any ramifications from my actions, I was lucky more than I was good.

The same goes for the other game-players out there. Guys, you can be as damn well arrogant as you like, but right now you're beating the law of averages, that's all. Maybe you'll be lucky like me and continue to stay a few steps ahead of disaster - but then again, maybe you won't. I advise you to pause, and consider my words.

One can only beat the laws of averages and probability for so long.  To put it another way, sooner or later, your luck WILL run out, Fellas...

After all, it only takes ONE woman to "regret" being with you ONE time to turn your life into a never-ending FUBAR nightmare.

BEM

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As I said, that was GREAT!  It's a warning to all you PUA studs out there; sooner or later, your luck will run out, and you best remember that.  Until next time...

MarkyMark

Sunday, July 11, 2010

The Catalog of Anti-Male Shaming Tactics

Guys,

Pardon my oversight, but the Catalog of Anti-Male Shaming Tactics isn't part of the MGTOW Survival Guide.  Shame on me!  If anything should be part of this site's reading material, it would be the catalog of shaming tactics.  Men need to be aware of the manipulative tricks women use, and they need to know how to counter them.  Without any further ado, here's the Catalog of Anti-Male Shaming Tactics...

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“Shaming tactics.”  This phrase is familiar to many Men’s Rights Activists.  It conjures up the histrionic behavior of female detractors who refuse to argue their points with logic.  Yet women are not the only ones guilty of using shaming tactics against men.  Male gynocentrists use them, too.

Shaming tactics are emotional devices meant to play on a man’s insecurities and shut down debate.  They are meant to elicit sympathy for women and to demonize men who ask hard questions.  Most, if not all, shaming tactics are basically ad homimem attacks. 

Anyway, it might be helpful to categorize the major shaming tactics that are used against men whenever a discussion arises about feminism, men’s issues, romance, etc.  The following list contains descriptions of shaming tactics, some examples of quotes employing the tactics, and even color-coded aliases for mnemonic purposes.  Enjoy.

Charge of Irascibility (Code Red)
Discussion: The target is accused of having anger management issues.  Whatever negative emotions he has are assumed to be unjustifiable.  Examples:
  • “You’re bitter!”
  • “You need to get over your anger at women.”
  • “You are so negative!”
Response: Anger is a legitimate emotion in the face of injustice.   It is important to remember that passive acceptance of evil is not a virtue.

Charge of Cowardice (Code Yellow)
Discussion: The target is accused of having an unjustifiable fear of interaction with women.  Examples:
  • “You need to get over your fear.”
  • “Step up and take a chance like a man!”
  • “You’re afraid of a strong woman!”
Response: It is important to remember that there is a difference between bravery and stupidity.  The only risks that reasonable people dare to take are calculated risks.  One weighs the likely costs and benefits of said risks.  As it is, some men are finding out that many women fail a cost-benefit analysis.

Charge of Hypersensitivity (Code Blue) – The Crybaby Charge
Discussion: The target is accused of being hysterical or exaggerating the problems of men (i.e., he is accused of playing “Chicken Little”).  Examples:
  • “Stop whining!”
  • “Get over it!”
  • “Suck it up like a man!”
  • “You guys don’t have it as nearly as bad as us women!”
  • “You’re just afraid of losing your male privileges.”
  • “Your fragile male ego …”
  • “Wow!  You guys need to get a grip!”
Response: One who uses the Code Blue shaming tactic reveals a callous indifference to the humanity of men.  It may be constructive to confront such an accuser and ask if a certain problem men face needs to be addressed or not (“yes” or “no”), however small it may be seem to be.  If the accuser answers in the negative, it may constructive to ask why any man should care about the accuser’s welfare since the favor will obviously not be returned.  If the accuser claims to be unable to do anything about the said problem, one can ask the accuser why an attack is necessary against those who are doing something about it.

Charge of Puerility (Code Green) – The Peter Pan Charge
Discussion: The target is accused of being immature and/or irresponsible in some manner that reflects badly on his status as an adult male.  Examples:
  • “Grow up!”
  • “You are so immature!”
  • “Do you live with your mother?”
  • “I’m not interested in boys.  I’m interested in real men.”
  • “Men are shirking their God-given responsibility to marry and bear children.”
Response: It should be remembered that one’s sexual history, marital status, parental status, etc. are not reliable indicators of maturity and accountability.  If they were, then we would not hear of white collar crime, divorce, teen sex, unplanned pregnancies, extramarital affairs, etc.

Charge of Endangerment (Code Orange) – The Elevated Threat Charge
Discussion: The target is accused of being a menace in some undefined manner.  This charge may be coupled with some attempt to censor the target.  Examples:
  • “You guys are scary.”
  • “You make me feel afraid.”
Response: It may be constructive to point out that only bigots and tyrants are afraid of having the truth expressed to them.  One may also ask why some women think they can handle leadership roles if they are so threatened by a man’s legitimate freedom of expression.

Charge of Rationalization (Code Purple) – The Sour Grapes Charge
Discussion: The target is accused of explaining away his own failures and/or dissatisfaction by blaming women for his problems.  Example:
  • “You are just bitter because you can’t get laid.”
Response: In this case, it must be asked if it really matters how one arrives at the truth.  In other words, one may submit to the accuser, “What if the grapes really are sour?”  At any rate, the Code Purple shaming tactic is an example of what is called “circumstantial ad hominem.”

Charge of Fanaticism (Code Brown) – The Brown Shirts Charge
Discussion: The target is accused of subscribing to an intolerant, extremist ideology or of being devoted to an ignorant viewpoint.  Examples:
  • “You’re one of those right-wing wackos.”
  • “You’re an extremist”
  • “You sound like the KKK.”
  • “… more anti-feminist zaniness”
Response: One should remember that the truth is not decided by the number of people subscribing to it.  Whether or not certain ideas are “out of the mainstream” is besides the point.  A correct conclusion is also not necessarily reached by embracing some middle ground between two opposing viewpoints (i.e., the logical fallacy of “False Compromise”).

Charge of Invirility (Code Lavender)
Discussion: The target’s sexual orientation or masculinity is called into question.  Examples:
  • “Are you gay?”
  • “I need a real man, not a sissy.”
  • “You’re such a wimp.”
Response: Unless one is working for religious conservatives, it is usually of little consequence if a straight man leaves his accusers guessing about his sexual orientation.

Charge of Overgeneralization (Code Gray)
Discussion: The target is accused of making generalizations or supporting unwarranted stereotypes about women.  Examples:
  • “I’m not like that!”
  • “Stop generalizing!”
  • “That’s a sexist stereotype!”
Response: One may point out that feminists and many other women make generalizations about men.  Quotations from feminists, for example, can be easily obtained to prove this point.  Also, one should note that pointing to a trend is not the same as overgeneralizing.  Although not all women may have a certain characteristic, a significant amount of them might. 

Charge of Misogyny (Code Black)
Discussion: The target is accused of displaying some form of unwarranted malice to a particular woman or to women in general. Examples:
  • “You misogynist creep!”
  • “Why do you hate women?”
  • “Do you love your mother?”
  • “You are insensitive to the plight of women.”
  • “You are mean-spirited.”
  • “You view women as doormats.”
  • “You want to roll back the rights of women!!”
  • “You are going to make me cry.”
Response: One may ask the accuser how does a pro-male agenda become inherently anti-female (especially since feminists often claim that gains for men and women are “not a zero-sum game”).  One may also ask the accuser how do they account for women who agree with the target’s viewpoints. The Code Black shaming tactic often integrates the logical fallacies of “argumentum ad misericordiam” (viz., argumentation based on pity for women) and/or “argumentum in terrorem” (viz., arousing fear about what the target wants to do to women).

Charge of Instability (Code White) – The White Padded Room Charge
Discussion: The target is accused of being emotionally or mentally unstable.  Examples:
  • “You’re unstable.”
  • “You have issues.”
  • “You need therapy.”
  • “Weirdo!”
Response: In response to this attack, one may point to peer-reviewed literature and then ask the accuser if the target’s mental and/or emotional condition can explain the existence of valid research on the matter.

Charge of Selfishness (Code Silver)
Discussion: This attack is self-explanatory.  It is a common charge hurled at men who do not want to be bothered with romantic pursuits.  Examples:
  • “You are so materialistic.”
  • “You are so greedy.”
Response: It may be beneficial to turn the accusation back on the one pressing the charge.  For instance, one may retort, “So you are saying I shouldn’t spend my money on myself, but should instead spend it on a woman like you —and you accuse me of being selfish?? Just what were you planning to do for me anyway?”

Charge of Superficiality (Code Gold) – The All-That-Glitters Charge
Discussion: The charge of superficiality is usually hurled at men with regard to their mating preferences.  Examples:
  • “If you didn’t go after bimbos, then …”
  • “How can you be so shallow and turn down a single mother?”
Response: Average-looking women can be just as problematic in their behavior as beautiful, “high-maintanence” women. Regarding the shallowness of women, popular media furnishes plenty of examples where petty demands are made of men by females (viz., those notorious laundry lists of things a man should/should not do for his girlfriend or wife). 

Charge of Unattractiveness (Code Tan) – The Ugly Tan Charge
Discussion: The target is accused of having no romantic potential as far as women are concerned.  Examples:
  • “I bet you are fat and ugly.”
  • “You can’t get laid!”
  • “Creep!”
  • “Loser!”
  • “Have you thought about the problem being you?”
Response: This is another example of “circumstantial ad hominem.”  The target’s romantic potential ultimately does not reflect on the merit of his arguments.

Charge of Defeatism (Code Maroon)
Discussion: This shaming tactic is akin to the Charge of Irascibility and the Charge of Cowardice in that the accuser attacks the target’s negative or guarded attitude about a situation.  However, the focus is not so much on the target’s anger or fear, but on the target’s supposed attitude of resignation.  Examples:
  • “Stop being so negative.”
  • “You are so cynical.”
  • “If you refuse to have relationships with women, then you are admitting defeat.”
  • “C’mon! Men are doers, not quitters.”
Response: The charge of defeatism can be diffused by explaining that one is merely being realistic about a situation.  Also, one can point out that asking men to just accept their mistreatment at the hands of women and society is the real attitude that is defeatist.  Many men have not lost their resolve; many have lost their patience.

Threat of Withheld Affection (Code Pink) – The Pink Whip
Discussion: The target is admonished that his viewpoints or behavior will cause women to reject him as a mate.  Examples:
  • “No woman will marry you with that attitude.”
  • “Creeps like you will never get laid!”
Response: This is an example of the logical fallacy “argumentum ad baculum” (the “appeal to force”).  The accuser attempts to negate the validity of a position by pointing to some undesirable circumstance that will befall anyone who takes said position.  Really, the only way to deal with the “Pink Whip” is to realize that a man’s happiness and worth is not based on his romantic conquests (including marriage).

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This is knowledge that EVERY MGHOW must have.  I feel better now that I have this precious knowledge here as well.  Thank you, and good day...

MarkyMark

Wednesday, June 30, 2010

The Wife Whisperer, by Laura Grace Robins

Guys,

I'm able to hit a local wireless network, so I'm striking while the iron's hot.  I'm posting Laura Grace Robins' shot heard round the world; I'm posting the post that has women worldwide in a tizzy; I'm talkin' about the post that's got everyone talking.  I'm talkin' about The Wife Whisperer, folks!  Without any further ado, here's the post everyone is talking about...

This is also a worthy addition to the MGTOW Survival Guide, which is why I'm including it here. MGTOW means exactly what it says: men going their own way. For some, that may include a relationship with a woman. For a rare few, this will include marriage also. For those of my fellow MGTOW who fall into either of the two categories, here is the "Reader's Digest condensed version" of how to have a successful relationship with a woman. As such, it's worthy of inclusion here. Thank you.

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Well, I'm going to get some heat for this one, but the analogy is worth pointing out. I can't help watching the Dog Whisperer show without seeing that a husband can also apply the same techniques to his wife. The major theme that Cesar Millan tries to get across is that as a dog owner you need to show that you are the leader of the pack and that you want your dog to be in a "calm and submissive" state. Hmmmmm, sounds familiar, huh? Discussions from my post, Submitting Love, got me to thinking if only there was a 'wife whisperer' who could come in and teach husbands how to get a handle on their wives. Below, I will offer some suggestions that are adapted from Cesar Millan's techniques.

If you are offended by my woman/dog analogies, please don't start barking at me. It only proves my point. Afterall, how did women get referred to as 'bitches' in the first place.

Here is a clip where Cesar discusses how to give affection to a dog. As you watch, every time he says "dog", put in "wife" instead. I think you will notice some curious similarities. 






If you are only giving "heart and body" in your affection, you will be "dragged all over the place and she won't care". Sound familiar? Therefore, you also have to give "mind". Notice the dog at the 1:53 mark. He says in that state, you can shower on all the affection you want, because she is being "calm and submissive". He says most people share affection when the mind is, "excited, aggressive, tense, fearful, panicky, unstable; people unfortunately have a tendency to share affection in order to calm the mind down--that only intensifies the behavior. It says "I agree with that behavior". So, in other words, when your wife is excited, aggressive, tense, fearful, unstable, etc., don't share affection, it only intensifies the behavior.

The best thing to do may be just be to walk away and let the unstable moment pass until she then assumes the 'calm and submissive' state. At that point, lay on the affection. It's positive reinforcement. The current cultural assumption is that when a woman is exhibiting any of those unstable traits, that you are suppose to console and comfort her. A man would be considered heartless if he walks away. Usually he is also considered heartless if he stays and says the wrong thing. So, what is a man to do? Often you just can't win with either and unstable dog or woman.

I think it also depends on whether she is throwing a hissy-fit over something trivial or whether there is some tragedy going on such as: a death in the family, loss of job, etc. In those cases, affection is appropriate and timely. I am not saying that men should never give affection to their wives; I'm saying, "only at the right time".

Here I found an article called, "How to Control Your Dog's Behavior by Being a Pack Leader". Below, I took some parts from that article and everywhere they wrote "dog", I swapped in "wife/woman". Some parts don't apply, like "How to Put on a Choke Chain". Believe it or not, I am NOT advocating that. Regardless, give it a read and you will see that it eerily makes sense. My extra thoughts are put in parentheses.

How to Control Your Wife's Behavior by Being a Pack Leader

Is your wife doing a behavior that you don't approve of? Does she pull you around? Do you feel that you can't control her? Is it hard to take items (pretty things) away from her without being bitten (not literally of course)?To solve all the symptoms, we must get to the root of the matter. Your wife is most likely thinking that she is the pack leader, or at least she is confused about who is the pack leader. When you claim leadership, the wife is free and content to be a happy willing follower.

1. Good Reasons to be a Pack Leader
Your wife will remain well-behaved, even around other women who may or may not be.
Your wife will learn to respect your possessions.
Reduces constant barking (or whining).
Your wife will be less anxious and nervous.
Your wife will be happier and more content.

2. Learn to Think like a Woman
Realize that there are some areas where women do think like men, and some areas where they do not. This is important because often men will reinforce negative behavior without knowing it.
Realize that women live in the present much more than men do. Just because a woman has done something for a while, doesn't mean that she can't change. In the same way, just because a woman has had a tough upbringing, or might have been abused, doesn't mean that she can't be rehabilitated into a loving, calm wife.
Women do not have guilt or pity in their mindsets/thinking. If a man expresses these emotions, a woman will interpret them as weakness.
Women can be given affection without being touched. A look can also convey affection.
Women have different levels of excitability that they progress through. A problem woman that goes into a frenzy in certain situations cannot be corrected when she has reached her highest level of intensity. You must correct at the lower levels to prevent her from becoming out of control.

3. Learn the Pack Mentality
Women have a pack mentality (or herd mentality). If you have a wife, you are a member of the same pack that she is.
If a husband shows weakness when he first brings her into their pack, the wife will often try to become the pack leader herself.
There will always be a pack leader. If you make sure that it is you, then you'll be able to control your wife in any situation because they will look to you to see how they should react.
A woman will try to become the pack leader if no one else is.
Consider women in a pack (think women and their girlfriend cliques; think how one woman in that group always tends to be the leader and the other women follow whatever she does). Women are happier when they know their place in the pack. Your wife will be more content and happy when you consistently behave like a pack leader. If you allow your wife to be leader in the home, but want to be the leader in other areas, you will frustrate your wife. (The trick, as a husband, is becoming that one popular woman in the girlfriend clique who she will follow around).
A pack leader ... (I recognize some of these are more a wife's realm, deciding about dinner, etc.)
Decides where the pack will go.
Decides when the pack will eat.
Decides who gets what food.
Decides who is allowed to bark (whine) and when (if at all).
Decides when the pack is allowed to play (decides when to separate business from pleasure).
Decides what the pack is allowed to play with (decides who are appropriate friends that will exert good influences).
Decides how other members of the pack must behave (decides how the family should behave).
Decides who owns what.
The rest of the pack is not resentful of how this works. To them, it is normal. If you modify your behavior to fit to this model (when relating to your wife), your wife will be content because her pack is working the way her instincts say it should. ( I think that is particularly interesting, about how her instincts say it should work, NOT how society says it should).
When pack leaders correct children in their pack, they are rarely aggressive, but just assertive. Men must learn this combination of calm assertiveness to master their role as the pack leader

4. Be Calm and Assertive When Dealing with Your Wife
Assertive is different than aggressive.
If your wife knows voice commands, use them:
Only in firm tones.
Don't use a high-pitched voice.
Don't speak in a cutesy voice, like you would to a baby.
Do not speak in anger.
Don't say it as if you are asking the wife a question.
If you give a command and you know your wife is purposefully ignoring you, stop giving the command, you're just making it worse.
If you have seen Star Wars, the "Jedi mind trick" is a good example of calm assertiveness. Not the waving of hands, but the firmness and calmness of the tone of voice.

5. Be the Pack Leader
A less dominant man can become the leader of many much larger and stronger woman. It is a matter of attitude, not physical power or strength.
Ways you can convey to your wife that you are the pack leader:
Exit the house first when you go out. Enter first when you go in.
Sit at the head of the table.
Let your wife know what behaviors you, as the pack leader, don't like.
Be consistent to correct any behavior that you don't want. Your wife will be confused if sometimes you correct her, and sometimes you don't.

Other Tips
Be assertive, but not aggressive.
Do not yell at your wife. If you think you have to, you are doing something wrong.
Share affection as much as you want, but only when your wife is in a calm, submissive state of mind.
Women usually want to please men. Be consistent, so they understand what you expect of them.
Be consistent. It will help your wife learn more quickly, and help them to trust you.

The last thing I want to bring up is that Cesar will often give a dog a little pinch when it is misbehaving. So perhaps a little pinch or squeeze of the hand will also do the wife good. Out in public, if she is getting too loud or annoying, or simply just not being respectful, give her a little sign that that sort of behavior is not acceptable. Works for me, and has caused me to bite my tongue. Sometimes it is also just a look. Come to think of it, don't pinch---that will get you a DV charge--ha! 

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Thank you, Laura.  That's great stuff!  Until next time...


MarkyMark